if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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