the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
