Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
