you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
