yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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