giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I want to fling myself into the sun
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
