Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
