I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
How external is "for external use only"?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Randomize
