The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
