Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
