Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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