I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Lo siento on account of my penis...
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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