IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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