Buhtt sex?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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