idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
