so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
