Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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