We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
