I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
