Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Randomize
