making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
