I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Randomize
