Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He shit in the fireplace
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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