you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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