yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
