Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
