Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
