Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
People in love make me want to vomit
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
