R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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