Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
