You can't special order awesome
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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