I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
