I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Let's get the cat blown out
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize