just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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