I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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