sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize