haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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