Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
