office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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