I want to make a zoo with you.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
