Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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