What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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