im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
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