You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
