I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize