the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
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