porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
