i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize