Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
