I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
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