there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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