I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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